Monday, May 15, 2017

GOSPEL OF GARGOYLE: TL;DR VERSION

For those who don't want to read nearly 27000 words about Gargoyle, I present to you the tl;dr version, in haiku.


Humble beginnings.
Like children, they scream real loud.
Exuberant youth.
They show their true form.
Formula solidified.
OG Ruten disc.
One true to its name.
An uncut gem to behold.
Embrace the weirdness.
 Furious throwback.
Here they discover the trick.
Just yell a whole bunch.
The She-ja sendoff.
Astounding Heaven Theory.
Melodic. Speedy.
Despite macho tunes,
I want to fuck Yotaro.
I don't care who sees.
A natural change.
It still includes heavy shit.
A fuckload, in fact.
This has "Satori"
What the fuck else do you need?
Best damn song ever.
I mean, this one's fine.
It's probably their weirdest.
Refrigerator.
OH FUCK OH FUCK YES!
OH GOD YES YES YES FUCK YES!
SPANK ME DADDY-O!
Yotaro is gone.
Kentaro is who remains.
Turns out they still rule.
Battle Gargoyle.
Like regular Gargoyle.
But battle-ier.
Fury and thunder.
The Beast Road has been traveled.
It leads to more riffs.
Breaking Dragon Wind.
Their first kinda "meh" album.
Still some great tracks though.
A final hurrah.
The last bastion of the weird.
Breathe deep one last time.
"The world needs more riffs."
So speaketh the Gargoyle.
The world got more riffs.
They're normal for once.
Still just raging riffs all day.
Kuromitten's rad.
 Some great, some boring.
Either way it still kicks ass.
Just needs a fat trim.
Seriously, why?
Why is this so god damned good?
You're old men now, chill!
 Wait, I was bluffing!
Don't listen to me, Kiba.
Go crazy again.
Now THIS is good shit.
Geshiki will wreck your neck.
Katsuji goes nuts.
 Thirty years later.
The debut is now long past.
Yet they still scream loud.

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